Gestational logorrhea: week 17 (and preschool countdown T-12 hours)

The belly is asserting itself now, though I still don't feel enormous all over. I went to the gym today and was still able to move around pretty well, though I have noticed my balance failing me, now and then. Must stay aware of that, mental note. In the past week I have also noticed it's harder to maneuver my way into a public restroom stall (which is a frequent occurrence). I didn't refuel enough after my workout this morning, and my reward is a dull and constant headache. Need to eat more frequent meals, mental note #2.

I'm burying the lede, though. Today I took Jonah to his school for "orientation." This was really just an informal 2 hour period where the kids could play around in the classroom and the teachers could get to know them (and where anxious parents like me could finally get the OK for sending peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, since there are no kids with peanut allergies severe enough for a peanut ban).

I sent an email to Josh in the afternoon, and I think it pretty much conveys the conclusion I came to about my brooding the past few weeks, so here is an excerpt:

"Today, crying was the furthest thing from my mind. Instead I got to stand back and marvel at this wonderful creature that we - somehow - have nurtured into a happy and resilient little boy, who is going to love school and get as much out of it as he can. I'm so proud of him, as you will be when you come to drop him off tomorrow. And we should be proud of ourselves, too, for bringing him to this stage and equipping him with the confidence to move ahead, learn, and make friends, even without us by his side 24/7."

As is my usual, I built up a difficult thing in my mind to nearly impossible proportions. The reality was much more pleasant. I feel similar to the way I did once I realized I no longer feared getting blood drawn (pregnancy will cure you of that fear). Except that in this case, the feeling is heightened, so I feel like I could even get voluntarily amputated, all because I know it couldn't possibly be as bad as it seems. Not planning to at the moment, however.