Maternal aphasia: Week Sixteen/Month Four

So it turns out that around sixteen weeks is when you start losing track of the weeks of your new baby's life. Plus, things get confusing - yesterday Abe turned sixteen weeks, but he won't be four months until next Friday. So far he is absolutely acting his age, which means, unfortunately, that we're probably in for a bit of a sleep shakeup. His skills are developing fast and furiously - he seems to be perhaps even a little more advanced than his brother was at this stage, not that I aim to compare them... This means he wakes himself up at night because he has scooted himself into an uncomfortable corner of his crib, and I am too tired to try to just put him back in the right position and see if he'll fall back asleep. This means I'm still spending about three hours a night with him on my chest, either nursing or sleeping or fighting to nurse or sleep, while I am uncomfortable due to his increasing weight on my sternum. My pneumonia is cleared but for optimal healing, I probably am not supposed to sleep with a wiggly baby on my chest.

I am in fact supposed to "take it easy" for the next 3 weeks. Luckily Jonah is in school for two more weeks, and then that leaves just a few full days that I need to lay low before I can resume my normal exertions. I have to believe we can do this. The fact that I'm starting out not nearly as weak as last time is encouraging, but also worries me that I'll try to overdo it before I'm ready. I was flying Abe above me like an airplane before, and then wondered if that could be considered "taking it easy."

I wish someone could tell me why motherhood gives me pneumonia. Now that I've had it twice in a year and a half I'm starting to worry it is lurking - dark shadow in my lungs, ready to strike at the slightest show of weakness on my part. Plenty of moms have as much or more on their plates than I do, and they don't get pneumonia! I'm back to squirting a couple of droppers full of astragalus tincture into my drinking water every day. It tastes nasty so it must be improving my "lung chi," right? RIGHT?

In other news, Jonah is becoming a potty champ. I'm so proud of him but still in such disbelief that he finally figured it out. Now we just have to figure out when we can back off and stop asking him if he needs to go. He doesn't seem to have a problem pooping or peeing in toilets outside our house, which is great. I almost think he sees it as an adventure - a whole new dimension to the outside world, with its differing fixtures and levels of cleanliness and soap dispensers. We'll be spending lots of time in the cafe around the corner from our house, since Jonah loves it there, and their bathroom is clean and very kid-friendly and, most importantly, right by the window into the kitchen where Jonah stands to watch them baking.

I caught myself trying to write a poem the other evening, while waiting to see the doctor. Instead of bringing reading material I brought a small notebook that I've used on and off for writing for the past few years. I didn't know where I was going to go when I started scribbling, but I wound up with a possible germ for a poem in there. Now I just have to find the time and inclination to follow it through...